Relational Hypnotherapy
Online hypnotherapy for repeating relationship patterns and the deeper patterns that shape how you relate.
Relational Hypnotherapy is individual hypnotherapy focused on the deeper patterns through which you relate—to yourself and to the people who matter to you.
Sometimes understanding a relationship pattern is important, but understanding alone does not change everything. You may recognize what keeps happening, understand where it came from, and still find yourself repeating the same response when relationship becomes emotionally significant.
In my practice, Relational Hypnotherapy works with the beliefs, fears, emotional associations, protective responses, and other subconscious patterns that may continue shaping how you experience intimacy, attachment, boundaries, trust, and connection.
Sessions are offered virtually.
What is Shamanic Healing?
A human being is more than a physical body and a thinking mind.
We also have spiritual and energetic dimensions that participate in our experience of being alive. When that energetic system becomes burdened, blocked, depleted, disrupted, or otherwise out of balance, insight and conversation may help us understand what is happening without necessarily addressing the disturbance itself.
Shamanic Healing works directly with the energetic and spiritual system to clear nonbeneficial patterns of energy.
A simple analogy is massage.
You may understand why a muscle is tense, but understanding the tension is different from working directly with the knot. Massage works with the tissue itself.
That is how I approach Shamanic Healing at the spiritual and energetic level: I work with the pattern itself.
Healing, rather than understanding, is the purpose.
When You Understand the Pattern but Still Repeat It
You may understand the pattern already.
You know that you overthink when someone pulls away.
You know that you silence what you really feel because you are afraid of conflict.
You know that you become preoccupied with whether someone still loves you.
You know that you keep giving more than you want to give, ignoring your own needs, or staying in situations that do not feel right.
Or perhaps your pattern moves in the other direction: closeness becomes uncomfortable, vulnerability feels dangerous, and some part of you begins pulling away when relationship becomes real.
You may understand where these patterns came from.
You may have reflected on them, journaled about them, meditated with them, read about attachment, talked them through, or promised yourself that next time will be different.
And still, when the relationship matters enough, something familiar takes over.
Awareness can change a great deal. Sometimes simply recognizing what we are doing gives us enough space to choose differently. But awareness does not automatically change every pattern.
You can know intellectually that you do not need someone else's approval and still feel deeply unsettled when they are disappointed with you.
You can understand that a partner's need for space does not necessarily mean rejection and still feel your mind and body react as though abandonment is already happening.
You can know that your needs matter and still struggle to voice them.
You can recognize that a relationship is asking you to betray something important in yourself and still feel unable to leave.
You can decide that you will stop pursuing unavailable people and find yourself drawn into the same dynamic again.
You don’t need more information.
You need to ask a deeper question:
“What more is happening beyond what I consciously understand?”
Hypnotherapy gives us a way to enter that question experientially rather than continuing to analyze it only from the surface.
What Is Relational Hypnotherapy?
I use Relational Hypnotherapy as the name for my individual hypnotherapy work focused on relationship and self-relationship.
Relationship is the field.
Hypnotherapy is the method.
We are working with your own inner experience: beliefs, expectations, fears, associations, habits, memories, imagery, emotional responses, protective strategies, and the ways you have learned to relate to yourself and others.
Depending on what you bring, this may include patterns involving:
people-pleasing or difficulty saying no
losing contact with your own needs inside a relationship
fear of rejection or abandonment
relationship anxiety and persistent reassurance-seeking
difficulty trusting
jealousy or preoccupation
difficulty receiving love, care, or affection
withdrawing when intimacy becomes vulnerable
difficulty expressing anger, hurt, needs, or boundaries
feeling responsible for another person's emotions
repeatedly entering familiar relationship dynamics
holding onto relationships that you know are no longer aligned
feeling compelled to pursue closeness when another person withdraws
becoming distant when another person becomes close
conflict between what you consciously know and how you automatically respond
You may recognize some of these experiences through language such as anxious attachment, avoidant attachment, people-pleasing, fear of abandonment, trust issues, or relationship anxiety.
Those frameworks can be useful.
But I am not interested in giving you another label. I am here to help you understand the actual pattern that is alive in you.
Where Do You Abandon Yourself in Relationship?
One of the questions at the center of my work is:
“Can I remain in right relationship with myself while I am in relationship with another person?”
Many relational difficulties involve some form of abandoning ourselves.
We stop listening to what we feel.
We override what we know.
We silence a need.
We abandon a boundary.
We shape ourselves around someone else's preferences.
We make another person's emotional state our responsibility.
We seek reassurance from them instead of staying present with what is happening within us.
We ignore something that feels wrong because losing the relationship feels even more frightening.
Or we abandon ourselves in the opposite direction: we disconnect, withdraw, harden, or disappear before another person can get close enough to hurt us.
These patterns do not make someone defective.
They often make sense when we understand what they have been trying to accomplish.
Perhaps a strategy once protected connection.
Perhaps it reduced conflict.
Perhaps it helped you belong.
Perhaps it helped you survive a relationship in which authenticity did not feel safe.
Perhaps it reflects something you learned during childhood about what love requires.
Understanding where a pattern came from can matter. But understanding is not the same as continuing to live by it.
The deeper question is what becomes possible now.
Relationship as Spiritual Practice
Relationship has been at the center of my spiritual training and practice for many years.
Not only romantic relationship:
relationship with the mind
relationship with the body
relationship with other people
relationship with Spirit
relationship with Life itself
Much of my spiritual work has increasingly come to revolve around right relationship.
For me, right relationship does not mean perfect relationship. It means learning to meet what is here in the present moment with greater honesty, responsibility, reverence, discernment, and care. Intimate relationships have a particular way of revealing where that work is unfinished.
Love can bring extraordinary beauty into our lives. It can also touch some of our deepest fears.
Closeness can illuminate where we do not trust ourselves.
Conflict can reveal the places where we learned to disappear, defend, appease, pursue, control, or withdraw.
The person in front of us may matter deeply, but what relationship awakens inside us matters too.
This is where my spiritual understanding influences the way I practice hypnotherapy.
I am not interested only in helping you produce a different outward behavior. I am interested in the deeper relationship beneath the behavior.
What are you protecting?
What are you afraid would happen if you acted differently?
What have you learned to believe about love?
What happens inside you when another person says no?
What happens when they become distant?
What happens when they become available?
What does it feel like to remain connected with yourself while allowing another person to be fully themselves?
Relational Hypnotherapy gives us a focused space to explore that territory.
How Hypnotherapy Enters the Work
Hypnosis is a natural state of focused attention.
You do not become unconscious. You do not surrender your judgment or agency. You remain able to speak, think, respond, ask questions, disagree, pause, or end the process.
In ordinary waking life, we often approach a relationship pattern through analysis.
We tell ourselves why we should stop.
We rehearse what we want to do differently.
We construct better arguments.
We remind ourselves of everything we already know.
Sometimes that works.
Sometimes the reaction is already happening before conscious reasoning has much influence over it.
Hypnotherapy allows us to work more directly with your inner experience while attention is focused and ordinary mental chatter has become less dominant.
Depending on the person and the purpose of the session, the work may involve:
guided hypnosis
imagery
focused awareness
hypnotic suggestion
subconscious dialogue
exploration of memories or associations
work with conflicting inner parts
reframing
body awareness
emotional processing
regression-oriented methods when appropriate
practicing new inner responses
I do not use a hypnotherapy script. Each session is completely unique. The work develops around the person in front of me and what actually emerges.
Responsibility Without Blame
Relationship patterns have histories.
We are shaped by families, partners, culture, pain, love, loss, conditioning, and circumstances we did not necessarily choose.
Recognizing those influences matters.
Blaming ourselves for having been shaped by them does not help us become free of them.
Neither does making another person entirely responsible for what happens next.
One principle runs through much of my work:
Responsibility does not require blame.
You can understand why a pattern developed without condemning yourself for having it.
You can recognize what another person did without pretending it did not matter.
You can set boundaries without hatred.
You can grieve what happened.
You can repair what is yours to repair.
And you can take responsibility for the relationship you are building with yourself now.
Relational Hypnotherapy is not about deciding whose fault everything is.
It is about becoming more capable of recognizing what belongs to you—and working with it.
Attachment Language Can Help—But It Is Not the Whole Person
Many people who come to this work recognize themselves through the language of attachment.
You may see yourself in descriptions of:
anxious attachment
avoidant attachment
anxious-avoidant dynamics
fear of abandonment
fear of intimacy
reassurance-seeking
people-pleasing
difficulty trusting
These frameworks can help you recognize patterns that once felt confusing.
I do not use them as a reason to reduce you to an attachment label.
Your relationship with love is more complex than a category.
If attachment language helps us understand what you experience, we can use it as a point of orientation.
Then we work with the person underneath the label.
What Happens During a Relational Hypnotherapy Session?
1. We begin with what is happening now.
We talk about the relationship pattern you want to explore.
This may involve a current relationship, a past relationship, a recurring pattern across several relationships, or your relationship with yourself.
The purpose is not to spend the entire session analyzing another person.
We are identifying the inner pattern that belongs to your side of the relationship.
2. We clarify what you want to understand or change.
Sometimes the intention is obvious.
You want to stop abandoning your boundaries.
You want to remain grounded when someone needs space.
You want to speak honestly without becoming overwhelmed by fear of rejection.
Other times, we begin with a more open question.
We create enough direction for the session without deciding in advance what we must discover.
3. We enter focused inner work.
I guide you into hypnosis and we begin working experientially with what arises.
You remain present and involved.
I may ask questions, invite imagery or sensation, work with an inner part, use suggestion, explore an earlier association, or follow another appropriate hypnotherapeutic pathway.
4. We work with what the pattern is actually doing.
A behavior that appears irrational on the surface may make more sense when we understand what it believes it is protecting.
The work is not to attack that part of you.
It is to understand that part well enough that a better relationship with it can become possible.
5. We integrate.
Before ending the session, we return fully to ordinary awareness and discuss what emerged.
There may be something to notice or practice afterward.
The session is part of the change.
Your life and relationships are where that change becomes lived.
Relational Hypnotherapy Is Individual Work
Relational Hypnotherapy is not couples therapy or marriage counseling.
Your partner does not attend the session.
The purpose is not to determine who is right, diagnose another person, mediate a disagreement, or repair a relationship on behalf of two people.
We work with your own inner experience and patterns.
Your relationship may provide the context.
You are the person doing the work.
There may also be times when Relational Hypnotherapy can exist alongside licensed therapy when each professional is working within their appropriate role.
A Spiritually Open Approach
I am a Shaman and Spiritual Teacher.
I am also a Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist.
Those roles influence one another, but I do not collapse them into the same service.
Relational Hypnotherapy is hypnotherapy.
It is not a Shamanic Healing session.
I do not automatically interpret a relationship pattern as spiritual, energetic, karmic, or rooted in a past life simply because those possibilities exist within my worldview.
At the same time, you do not need to remove your spiritual life from the room.
If your relationship questions involve spiritual practice, dreams, intuition, synchronicities, psychedelic experiences, past-life imagery, your relationship with the Divine, or other nonordinary experience, you are welcome to speak openly about those things.
I take spiritual experience seriously.
I also take discernment seriously.
We can distinguish what you experienced from what we conclude about it.
Mystery does not require dismissal.
It also does not require premature certainty.
Relational Hypnotherapy and Shamanic Healing
Both forms of work may involve something that feels deeper than conscious understanding.
They are still different practices.
Relational Hypnotherapy
The primary focus is your own inner experience and the patterns through which you relate.
We work through hypnosis, focused awareness, imagery, dialogue, suggestion, associations, beliefs, memories, and other hypnotherapeutic methods.
Shamanic Healing
Shamanic Healing is direct spiritual and energetic healing.
I establish a spiritual healing container and work with Spirit, my Helpers, the client's soul-self, and the energetic and spiritual dimensions of the person.
One modality is not automatically better or deeper than the other.
Different situations call for different work.
If you are unsure which is appropriate, we can determine where to begin during your consultation.
My Training and Experience
I became a Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist through the Hypnotherapy Academy of America in 2017, completing approximately 500 hours of professional hypnotherapy training.
My professional hypnotherapy education has included training in:
Clinical Hypnotherapy
Medical Support Hypnotherapy
Accelerated Healing and Pain Management
Natal Regression
Interlife Regression
Past-Life Regression Therapy
I also hold a B.A. in Integrative Psychology from SUNY Empire State University.
I have worked professionally with clients in private practice since 2015 and have practiced hypnotherapy professionally since completing my certification in 2017.
Alongside that formal training, my spiritual path and shamanic training have developed continuously since my initiation in 2012.
These different forms of education have given me different ways of understanding human experience.
Academic and professional training have helped me understand mind, behavior, inner experience, and change.
Mindfulness has taught me to notice clearly.
Hypnotherapy has given me a way to work with patterns that may not respond readily to conscious analysis.
My spiritual training has placed discernment, responsibility, and right relationship at the center of how I live and work.
I value all of these perspectives.
Is Relational Hypnotherapy a Good Fit for You?
This work may be worth exploring if:
you recognize a repeating relationship pattern and want to understand your own part in it more deeply
you are self-aware but find that insight alone has not changed the pattern
you lose contact with yourself when attachment, attraction, conflict, or fear becomes intense
you want to become more capable of expressing needs and maintaining boundaries
you notice people-pleasing, pursuit, withdrawal, mistrust, reassurance-seeking, or similar recurring responses
you are willing to examine yourself without making yourself the enemy
you want individual inner work rather than couples counseling
you are open to experiential work with hypnosis
you are spiritually open or comfortable working with someone whose worldview includes spiritual dimensions of human life
you are willing to participate actively in what happens after the session
This work is not intended to replace licensed mental-health treatment.
If you primarily need psychotherapy, couples therapy, diagnosis, treatment of a mental-health disorder, domestic-violence services, crisis intervention, or another form of specialized clinical support, I will encourage you to seek the appropriate professional care.
Virtual Relational Hypnotherapy
Sessions are offered online.
Hypnosis does not require us to be physically present in the same room.
Meeting virtually also allows you to do this inner work from a private and familiar environment.
For a session, you will need:
a quiet, private place where you will not be interrupted
a stable internet connection
a comfortable place to sit or recline
headphones if they help you focus
enough privacy to speak openly
some space after the session to settle and reflect when possible
Scope and Boundaries
Relational Hypnotherapy is individual hypnotherapy for personal growth, self-exploration, and work with subconscious patterns that shape how you relate.
It is not:
psychotherapy or mental-health counseling
couples therapy or marriage counseling
psychiatric treatment
medical or mental-health diagnosis or treatment
emergency or crisis care
a substitute for appropriate licensed healthcare
a guarantee of a particular outcome
If you are experiencing significant psychological distress, relationship circumstances requiring clinical support, or another issue that calls for licensed mental-health care, seek appropriate professional support.
Relational Hypnotherapy may exist alongside psychotherapy, couples therapy, or other forms of care when appropriate.
It should not be used to replace them.
Session Details
Duration: 90 minutes
Format: Online / virtual
Investment: $222
First-time clients begin with a free consultation before booking a Relational Hypnotherapy session.
Returning clients may book future Relational Hypnotherapy sessions directly.
I do not assume that every person needs the same number of sessions.
Some work may be focused. Other patterns may require more time.
We can work one session at a time and decide what is appropriate based on what actually emerges.
Frequently Asked Questions
-
Relational Hypnotherapy is the name I use for my individual hypnotherapy work focused on how you relate—to yourself and to other people.
A relationship pattern may be what brings you to the work, but the session focuses on your own inner experience: beliefs, fears, emotional associations, protective responses, habits, memories, and the ways you have learned to seek, receive, protect, or withdraw from connection.
-
No.
Relational Hypnotherapy is individual work. Your partner does not attend the session, and the purpose is not to mediate a disagreement or determine who is right.
We work with what belongs to your side of the relationship: what you feel, fear, believe, protect, repeat, avoid, or struggle to express.
If you want to work directly on a relationship as a couple, couples therapy or marriage counseling may be more appropriate.
-
Yes, when the focus is your own inner experience and relational patterns.
For example, we may explore fear of rejection, reassurance-seeking, difficulty staying grounded when someone pulls away, persistent worry about the relationship, or the tendency to abandon your own needs in order to preserve connection.
Attachment language can be useful, but I do not treat you as though a label explains the whole person.
-
Yes.
We may explore experiences such as withdrawing when closeness increases, shutting down during vulnerability, protecting yourself through emotional distance, or feeling conflicted when someone becomes genuinely available.
The goal is not to force greater intimacy.
It is to understand what the response is protecting and create more room for conscious choice.
-
Hypnotherapy may be useful when relationship anxiety is connected with recurring inner patterns such as fear of rejection, overthinking, reassurance-seeking, mistrust, or difficulty remaining connected with yourself when attachment becomes intense.
The work focuses on your own beliefs, emotional associations, protective responses, and ways of relating rather than simply trying to suppress the anxious feeling.
-
Sometimes another person's behavior genuinely is harmful, dishonest, incompatible, unavailable, or simply not what you want in your life.
Inner work should not become a way of explaining away what another person is actually doing.
Relational Hypnotherapy helps you become clearer about what belongs to you so you can respond more honestly to what is happening.
Sometimes that supports a healthier way of remaining in relationship.
Sometimes greater clarity shows you that a relationship needs to change or end.
-
No.
I may help you explore what you feel, what you fear, what you value, what patterns are active, and what you already know beneath the confusion.
The decision remains yours.
My role is to support your discernment, not replace it.
-
Regression methods are part of my professional training and may occasionally be relevant.
I do not assume that a present relationship pattern must come from a past life.
If unusual imagery, spiritual material, or an experience interpreted as past-life material emerges, we can approach it with openness and discernment without requiring one predetermined explanation.
-
No.
You remain conscious and able to think, speak, make choices, ask questions, disagree, pause, or end the process.
Hypnotherapy is collaborative. I am not interested in overriding your judgment or agency.
-
That is not a problem.
People experience hypnosis differently. You may notice images, sensations, feelings, memories, words, impressions, or simply a sense of knowing.
We work with however your inner experience naturally presents itself.
-
Hypnosis does not require physical proximity.
We meet by video while you are in a quiet, private, comfortable space. You remain able to communicate with me throughout the session just as you would in person.
For many people, working from their own familiar environment makes it easier to settle into inward-focused work.
-
There is no predetermined number.
Some patterns may be relatively focused. Others have developed over many years and may unfold more gradually.
I prefer to work one session at a time and decide what is appropriate based on what is actually happening rather than assume everyone needs the same fixed program.
A Different Way of Relating Can Begin With You
You cannot control whether another person stays, leaves, understands you, changes, or gives you what you hoped for.
But you can become more aware of what happens inside you when relationship touches fear, longing, vulnerability, attachment, or loss.
The patterns that take over in those moments may have histories. They may have once protected you, preserved connection, or helped you navigate something you did not yet know how to meet differently.
Relational Hypnotherapy gives us a place to work with those patterns—not by blaming you for having them, but by becoming more conscious of what they are doing and what may now be possible instead.
The goal is not to need relationship less.
It is to become more capable of remaining in relationship with yourself while being deeply in relationship with another person.
If that is the work you are ready to explore, we can begin with a consultation.